Alrighty…
The concert was such a trip. I feel so exhausted after the past couple of days but the concert was fun. Details, details, details are what follows.
Dana’s mom dropped her off at my work just a little after 5. So we hopped in my car, got on the Parkway, and in no time were at the PNC Bank Arts Center exit.
Warning: Apparently, I must have been sending out crazy signals to every frat boy, and 35-45 year old guy there. I have quite a way of attracting the wacko nut job crowd.
So I follow the people who are directing the parking to a spot. Not something uncommon. They direct me to an open spot between two cars. Well, the two cars are people who know each other…and they are all tailgating, hoping to save the spot for some other friends of theirs. These guys proceed to get in a yelling match with the parking dude over whether or not I should park there. They make me park there. The guys say they are going to make the time miserable there. Not much I could do then cause they closed off the rest of the parking area. Thank goodness the one guy’s girlfriend was like, hey guys…she’s only doing what they told her to do. She won’t get in the way.
So, Dana and I get out of the car…have some yummy sub sandwiches, mine was a meatball sub. Scrumdidiliumscious! Plus I got a little present…another Glow-In-The-Dark Condom. yeeeey. We, and when I say we, I mean Dana, inconspicuously, jotted down the guys license plates numbers in case my poor car had any damage to it when we got back.
We enter PNC with no problems. I call my mom just to let her know what was going on. We both decide a potty trip would be in order, and got on the super long line. Yuck, is all I have to say about that. I’d pay an extra 10 bucks if I could get someone to clean one of those toilets before I use it.
We make our way to our seats, which are super awesome although on the end of the row, under the covering. They had some DJ out playing songs. He wasn’t that great. Then our weird wacko nearby seat neighbors finally joined us in the surrounding rows.
Culprit number 1: About 40 year old guy…maybe a bit younger, came with either his wife or girlfriend. Drunk before the band really gets into things. Touches Dana’s…backside as he steps by us saying, “I love this stuff”. He gyrates (bad dancing) the rest of the way to his seat. About part of the way just at the start of John Mayer’s set he has to pass cause he…needs a beer. He grabs us both and says, “I love you guys. Do you want a beer? I’ll get you both a beer.” Dana and I exchange scared crazy glances, while both shaking our heads. “I’ll get you one beer and you two can split it.” We finally get up enough courage to tell him no thanks. The guy behind me, Culprit number 2 (more on him later), taps me on the shoulder after the guy 1 leaves and says, “Hey you should have gotten me the beer. Next time ask him for a beer and give it to me.” Back to guy 1, he comes back from getting his beer. He thanks us again for being so super awesome, and manages to dribble beer on the edge of Dana’s capri pants. Not cool. Halfway through the set, guess what happens, guy 1 needs to use the rest rooms. He comes past us again, this time saying, “You guys are good for not drinking beer. This is what it does to you.” Guy number 2 asks me why I didn’t ask him for a beer. Bah. Guy 1 comes back, this time with a cookie. “Hey take my cookie….no have a piece I swear.” I take a piece of cookie, just so that he would leave and go back to his seat, which he did. I, then after having to talk to guy number 2 about not getting a beer, proceed to drop the cookie inconspicuously on the ground. Who knows where that cookie has been. We managed to leave the concert before we had have any more encounters with guy number 1.
Culprit number 2: The guy…mid 20s sitting behind me. Loves John Mayer. Decides he is going to whistle whenever there was a lull in the screaming. First time makes me jump. Luckily he sees me do it, and apologizes. I ask him (wrong thing to do, don’t ever do this, cause then the feel the need to talk to you afterwards) to just tap me on the should before he does it so that I can stuff my fingers in my ears. His girlfriend was good and kept reminding him to do it before he whistled…not so bad. But yeah, no ear drums afterwards. Plus, all of his shenanigans dealing with guy number 1.
Culprit number 3: 50 some-odd year old lady, drunk, in heels. I needed to go to the bathroom. You would have thought after my first experience with the bathroom that I could just hold it and wait til we got back to Dana’s. NOPE. I’m almost finished in my stall, when there is a big splash from the stall next to me. I look down to see a knocked over beer cup, and hear, “Damnit, I spilt my beer!!” I look down and the bottom half of my pants were splotchy with beer stains. Yuck. She managed to actually get me from under the stall wall. Crazy, I know. No fun, by then both Dana and I had been attacked by beer.
So how was the concert you ask? It was good. Maroon 5 was great. John Mayer impressed me. He’s a very adept guitar player. So all in all a good show. We leave a tiny bit early…my car is fine, and it takes us about 20-30 minutes to get to Dana’s house.
That was our crazy adventure. I don’t think I missed anything. I can’t wait to go home from work, and maybe watch the men’s all around competition for gymnastics. oooo Paul Hamm, cute and freckly, like me!
Bye bye!
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